At What Cost?

October 4, 2010 at 2:35 pm Leave a comment

If you’ve been a reader of my blog, you know my story.  I’m a “recovering” emotional and compulsive eater, and a woman who has struggled greatly with body image (read: I always thought I was fat.)

But we know all of that already. That’s the easy part of the story. The surface story.

I am constantly fascinated with myself as I continue to do personal/self-growth work that the layers of my life keep peeling open. Only recently it became clear to me that I gave up so much in life to try and have the perfect body. I always felt the need to have complete and total control over myself for fear that if I let go just a little bit, if I became just a little vulnerable, my life would spiral out of control. Meaning, I wouldn’t be thin anymore (and I’d be fat).

So my question to you:  What has trying to be thin (or have the perfect body) cost you?

Here are some answers that apply to me. See if they sound familiar:

*Skipping out on events/dinners/parties with friends because I was afraid to eat fattening food.

*Compulsive exercise and the feeling that if I didn’t sweat buckets, the workout wasn’t good enough. Or spending too much precious free time to go to the gym when I could be bonding with my husband/family/friends.

*Comparing myself to others with body parts I desired (tall skinny legs and bouncy hair!) which lead me to more depression and more binges

*Inability to feel my “feminine.” For me, this meant I was so into controlling how I looked and doing, doing, doing that I let my softer, feminine side slip away. I’m only now working with an expert to learn how to access that part of myself

*Lack of sex or promiscuous sex. You’re uncomfortable with receiving pleasure or you search for it in the wrong places in an effort to feel worthy.

Do any of these sound familiar to you? The above all represent my life for many years. It was only until I realized that accepting my body as it was, flaws and all, was more important than having a “perfect” body that I began to heal. That I began to LIVE.

And let me tell you, my life is a heck of a lot juicier now than ever before. And I’m my highest weight since I was 20.

So, what is the quest/desire/drive/need to be thin, to possess your perfect body, costing you? Are you giving up deeper relationships, happiness, having FUN?  Make a list, like I did, of what you’re missing out on and perhaps you’ll discover that your drive to be thin isn’t really worth it after all.

**Have you signed up for the FREE virtual Love Your Body Day Telesummit? No? Sign up here and get my free report, “10 Ways We Love Our Body Best.” By signing up you’ll get access to over 15 experts in the health and wellness fields, helping you to live your best, juiciest life possible. Can’t attend? No problem! Sign up anyway and you’ll get recordings of all the calls so you can listen on your own time.


Entry filed under: nutrition.

Calm down with Ashwagandha When the going gets tough…do nothing.

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