Drop down and give me 134.4 pounds!

July 9, 2010 at 4:28 pm 6 comments

I'm sorry, but this is the most RIDICULOUS photo I've ever seen. This picture makes women go on diets.

Yes, friends, that’s my weight, right there in BIG, BOLD letters.

A year ago, I would’ve been ashamed to tell you how much I weighed.

Now, I feel absolutely NO emotional connection to that number. As of today. I mean come on, it’s just a number, right? Right?

This morning I started Boot Camp again (Park Slopers, it’s awesome!) and after an hour of sweating my tush off, the trainer took measurements (to be done monthly). I haven’t looked at a scale in months, but I knew my weight was creeping up. These thoughts were confirmed when I looked down at the scale and saw the number 134.4 pounds SPEAK back to me (Yes, this scale not only displayed the number but SPOKE it…more like SHOUTED it!)

For the first time in my life, I looked down at that number and felt nothing. No disappointment. No, “Oh, I’m a bad, unmotivated person and I am worthless and should be ashamed of myself!” I’ve had years and years of that tape playing in my head, and truthfully it was getting really worn out.

Today I CELEBRATE my INDEPENDENCE from my weight. Would I like to lose a few pounds? Yes. But I’m motivated by getting into better shape and FEELING better about myself, and not living my life by the number on the scale. As someone who has been 145 pounds and also 118 pounds, been there, done that.

I can’t tell you how liberating I feel. To know that my self-worth, as a woman, a human being, has NOTHING to do with the way I look is friggin awesome. Sure, it took me many many many many many years and lots of hard work to get here, but baby, I’ve arrived!

Do you weigh yourself? What’s your relationship to the scale?

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Entry filed under: nutrition. Tags: , , , , , , , .

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6 Comments Add your own

  • 1. michellemarievoss  |  July 9, 2010 at 4:47 pm

    I LOVE this post! I’ve tried weighing myself daily, and I’ve tried not weighing myself at all. I have recently decided that I need to weigh myself once a week. It helps me realize when I have been getting off track with my eating and fitness habits. I could care less what the actually number is. I have been 103 and I have been 125, and to be honest I was in the best shape of my life at 125, it is when I ran my half marathon. It’s just about feeling happy and healthy.

    Reply
    • 2. Amanda  |  July 9, 2010 at 4:49 pm

      Michelle, thanks so much for sharing! It’s amazing how I feel so much better about myself at a heavier weight…I would like to lose a few pounds, and being weighed monthly will help keep me on track, but Im glad to hear for you it’s not about the #! thank you!

      Reply
  • 3. Kate  |  July 9, 2010 at 5:40 pm

    I have, as you know, had a lifelong battle with my weight/body type. At 6′ tall, I have a lot more leeway than most, but have definitely gotten off track in recent years. My weight now is WAY over what I want it to be, but the fact is I eat healthily, I exercise daily, and I feel healthy. I do still weigh myself weekly and I’m not going to lie, I am, at times, very disappointed with what I see. But more and more, I am coming to realize that THIS IS MY BODY and I need to accept it as it is. As long as I’m treating it in the best possible ways, as long as I can walk miles and miles without feeling exhausted, as long as I can dance for hours and feel exhilarated, how bad off can I really be?

    Reply
  • 4. Abbey  |  July 9, 2010 at 6:45 pm

    I also love this post. Who doesn’t fluctuate?!?! I NEVER weigh myself because you’re right – it’s just a number. I’ve been anywhere from 104 to 150 (post-living in Spain with daily doeses of churros con chocolate) and I am happy where I am, thank you very much!

    Reply
  • 5. Florrie  |  July 10, 2010 at 2:18 am

    love it! I weigh myself daily, but base how I feel off of how I have treated my body, Most important on eating fresh healthy foods, exercising, and feeling like I am giving my body the tlc it derserves. Scale just keeps me honest:)

    Reply
  • 6. When you want it bad… « Cake & Carrots  |  July 27, 2010 at 1:12 pm

    […] with my mother last weekend and I was talking to her about my weight. If you recall, I wrote a post on weighing 134 pounds, a higher weight for me, yet not having any emotional attachment to it […]

    Reply

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